6 things to ask your partner during the dating phase

Choose your partner wisely. Because that one decision will affect almost every other decision you make. But how do you choose the right partner? You have to look beyond the butterflies in your stomach. Attraction is a powerful thing, which is why you have to ask some important questions in the dating phase. These questions will help you understand your potential partner before you go deeper.

In the modern day dating scenario, this question carries much weight. You need to know whether they want something casual, serious, undefined, or if they're genuinely confused about their own needs. Listen carefully to the answer. Look if it aligns with you. You don’t want to fall for someone who is in between relationships, or just taking a breather!

Now, you are not asking about their past, but how they dealt with it. This question is a window to their character. How they reflect on their past says everything about them. Do they take accountability, or do they only blame their ex? This will also tell you whether they are likely to repeat the same patterns with you. You will also get to know whether they are truly done with the ex.

Asking this question is very important, because two people can use the same word and mean completely different things. For one commitment might mean exclusivity, and for the other, it may mean their happily ever after. Some may not like the idea of exclusivity. So get specific. Ask what commitment looks like in action for them.

If all the above aligns, you also need to ask this question. Do they like to settle down, or explore the world. What matters more - family or freedom? Do they prefer spiritual practice or secular living? What are their career ambitions? Children or childfree? Living in a city or countryside? All these small details matter. They shape how your life would look like if this proceeds.

Yes, you are taken away by their charm. But, here’s the thing. Charm can fade. They were in their best behaviour on the first date, but can you expect it going forward? To understand this, you should know about their actual values. Ask them what honesty means—do they believe in radical transparency, or is there room for privacy? How do they see loyalty? What is the deal-breaker for them. These questions will clearly show you who they really are.

Some people are team players, and others are lone wolfs. You have to know what you are inviting into your life. So ask them what they are drawn towards. Some crave real connection, and emotional depth. For others it may trigger insecurity. Some people value independence, and some cannot do without collaboration. All these answers point at to the kind of relationship you can expect.
Ask these questions early. Listen to the answers.