Subtle differences between true love and toxic love

Though love is a beautiful and bewitching emotion, there are many versions of it. Depending on person to person, love may take a different form for each of them. For some, it means being with their partners 24/7, while for others it may take the form of extreme possessiveness. Thus, it is important to identify what constitutes ‘love’. There is a fine line between love and what’s not love at all. One must be especially aware of the latter. To help you with this, here are some subtle differences between true love and toxic love.

In true love, both the people want the best for one another, and the development of self is more important. You need to work on yourself for yourself only, and if you are not doing so, you are letting the other person down. After all, you have to love yourself before you love other people. However, in toxic love, the primary focus is on the relationship only. So neither of the two is improving one another.

In true love, there is comfort in separate interests. We can have our own friends and meaningful relationships outside of our romantic relationships. We can pursue interests and ideas without fear of reprimand. On the other hand, in toxic love, there is total involvement in one another’s lives. One can’t go anywhere without the other. This is codependency, which slows down any individual progress and forces the couple to be with each other excessively.

In true love, intimacy is a free choice that grows from love, trust, care, and friendship. In toxic love, sex is something you feel pressured over due to fear, insecurity, and feeling as though you have to conform to the sexual desires of your partner.

In true love, there is no struggle to accept the individuality of your partner. Their quirks and habits are a part of their personality, and there is no reason to change them. However, in toxic love, there is an obsession with trying to change your partner into someone you would rather be with, instead of loving them for who they are. Because of this, both the individuals won't match or live up to the expectations of each other.

Conversations are constructive in true love. They are done in order to understand, help, and convey affection to your partner. On the other hand, conversations are intended to blame or manipulate each other. And manipulation is the biggest evil in a relationship. No one is trying to improve themselves, just change the other person.