Perizaad: Kolkata wants the best from you

Perizaad Zorabian Irani, who is part of ‘Dinner With Friends’ that will be staged at the Kolkata Festival, opens up about infidelity, insecurity and intensity in a relationship....
You have travelled to different cities with the play, “Dinner With Friends”. What is it like performing in Kolkata?
Be it my films or play, the audience here is very attentive and intelligent.It is a delight to perform before an audience that is receptive. They are so alert, alive and excited. They have the liking for that something more. I guess, the strongest critics are here in Kolkata. The audience here isn’t very forgiving in the sense that they want the best from you. And being culturally driven as they are, I don’t think you can treat them to anything mediocre.
In the play, there are four characters, Vikram, Maya, Harsh and Diya. Out of Diya and Maya. Who do you think is your mirror image?
When Feroz Khan approached me with the script, I was dying to play Diya that is essayed by Tisca Chopra. He firmly
dismiseed any such intention and gave me the role of Maya, explaining, that the character needed an emotional honesty that only I could deliver. I want to play Diya because she is everything that I’m not. But Maya is more like me. She believes in everything that I believe in. I relate to her passion and, at times, her stubborness.
The play, as the name suggests, shows how the two couples and the four friends find comfort in each other when faced with crises in life. In case of real crises, do you seek comfort in yourself or resort to friends?
My family is very very dear to me and they are my pillars of support. So, in case of true crisis, the ones I would rush to would be my family. But if something not that grave and stressful hits me, I would first want to discuss it with my best friend and try and resolve the crisis rather than stress my parents or family out. What I am trying to say is that my friends are as important to me as family. I can’t and couldn’t differentiate between the two. As far as the play is concerned, its beauty lies in bringing to the fore, the fact how human relationships are getting rattled in the course of this divorce. There is a crack that appears between the four friends, which is tragic.
“Dinner With Friends” also deals with infidelity in marriage. Can this trait be pardoned in reality?
I would be lying if I say that the fear of infidelity in a relationship doesn’t bother me. It does. To me, the most important thing in a relationship is to be faithful. It’s the basis, the core. And it’s a fear because in today’s world moving from one relationship to another is all so common. It is no longer a taboo. But, yes, I’m not obsessed with such concerns. As my husband, Boman, always says, ‘Enjoy the now. Don’t keep thinking, what if? Fact is, if something has to happen, it will happen and I’m going to take it as it comes. As to whether infidelity can be pardoned, I think, I might be able to forgive that person but I don’t know if I have the emotional ability to overcome the trauma — to come to terms with the fact that the person I trusted with my life, betrayed me. I can’t be the same person with him again. I wonder, if there’s no trust in a relationship, is it of any worth being in that relationship?
While infidelity is associated more with men, Diya, one of the married female characters in the play, also has an affair. Do you ever fear the fate of your relationship with Boman, if you ever stray?
I’m an intrinsically and emotionally black and white person. Fact is, life has grey shades too. But I don’t have that emotional break up for the grey shades. So, in my head, it’s unacceptable to go down that road. I’m not being moralistic when I say that it would be difficult to take the other path. My fear, if any, stems from the fact whether my spouse will find the new me, the one, who is also a mother, not so exciting as the earlier and carefree me. For me, chances of infidelity creeps in when a couple isn’t connected. And I do everything in my power to keep the connection in my marriage alive. It’s something most couples need to and should consciously work on. There’s a line in the play where Vikram (Joy Sengupta) says, ‘Life without Maya makes me anxious’. That is Boman’s favourite line in the play. Feroz once told me, ‘Perizaad, even when there’s conflict in a relationship, the marriage can work, but when there’s no reaction, the marriage is over’.
So, how are you as a wife?
I am not suspicious at all. That’s so not me. Even my husband is very chilled out. He keeps telling me to not let go of myself. Problem is, a lot of us women forget to take care of ourselves that makes us cranky. If I take care of myself a little more, I’ll have the energy to give a lot more to all my relationships. Boman’s advice to me is to keep two hours for myself when I’m no one but Perizaad Zorabian.
Can you trust Boman blindfolded?
Boman is an exceptionally good human being. I trust him with my life. The fear that I mentioned stems more from my insane love for him. He is such an influence in my life that my greatest fear is to lose him.