5 parenting mistakes that unconsciously promote gender bias in children

Children should be taught about gender equality from the beginning to help them develop an equalitarian and positive outlook as they grow up. It can be difficult to shield your child from environments where they can observe and learn gender roles. Here are 5 mistakes that unconsciously promote gender bias in children that all parents should look out for:

You may not realise that you are teaching your children language that perpetuates stereotypes based on gender. Parents often use specific adjectives for their children based on their gender and reinforce behaviour that aligns with gender roles. Using phrases such as “running like a girl” and “behaving unladylike” unconsciously teaches young children that they should conform to a prescribed way of being because they happen to be a specific gender.

The next time you see a toy like a kitchen set, think about why you think it is an appropriate gift for a girl and not a boy. Many parents don’t realise that they expose their children to limited hobbies and interests based on gender stereotypes. Encourage both girls and boys to try out indoor and outdoor activities and give them gender-neutral gifts like books, puzzles and games.

Children learn by example. Simply teaching them not to believe in gender stereotypes will not be effective if they observe gender roles in the household. When there is an unequal division of parenting tasks and the mother is the primary caregiver, children unconsciously learn that men are not supposed to perform ‘domestic’ tasks like cleaning and nurturing. Ensure that you and your partner demonstrate to your children that housework is not a gender-specific task.

A major external source that teaches children negative stereotypes is TV, films and books. Instead of shutting down your child’s exposure to media altogether, seek books and media which are not violent or stereotypical. When your child comes across media which shows gender roles, encourage discussions to help them think critically.

Make sure your children play with both girls and boys. This will allow them to explore different types of behaviour, interests and activities meant for both girls and boys. Having only same-sex friendships can make your child more susceptible to stereotypes and gendered ways of behaving. A diverse friend group will also make your child more respectful of their differences with other children.