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Are we raising a mentally weak generation? Doctor answers

TOI Lifestyle Desk
| ETimes.in | Last updated on - May 24, 2025, 05:30 IST
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What does it mean to be mentally weak?


In many modern homes, love is overflowing, but so is worry. There’s a rising concern among psychologists and educators alike: Are today’s children growing up without the mental strength they truly need? This question isn’t about blaming families. Instead, it’s about understanding how some well-meaning habits might be holding children back emotionally and mentally.

​Dr Daniel G Amen, a respected psychiatrist known for transforming lives through brain health, puts it simply: “If too much is done for children, they might not learn how to do things for themselves.” This idea hits home, especially in a time where comfort often comes before challenge.
Here’s how this shift may be happening, and why small, intentional changes at home could help raise more emotionally strong children.

2/6

Over-rescuing children from everyday struggles

Many parents step in quickly when a child forgets their homework or loses a jacket on a chilly day. It may feel like a loving gesture, but Dr Amen believes that these “rescues” can quietly steal opportunities for growth.


When a child is always saved from the discomfort of a mistake, they miss out on learning how to solve problems, face natural consequences, or adapt to life’s bumps.


Emotional strength builds when children are allowed to stumble and stand back up again. Each challenge faced independently becomes a silent teacher of resilience.

3/6

The “boredom is bad” myth

There’s a belief in many households that boredom is a problem to fix. Entertainment is quickly handed over in the form of screens, schedules, or stimulation. But according to child psychologists, boredom is not the enemy—it’s a doorway to creativity.


Dr Amen suggests that instead of solving boredom, parents should invite curiosity: “I wonder what you’re going to do about it.”


This shift gives a child the chance to imagine, explore, and build the inner ability to cope with stillness—something essential in today’s high-speed world.

4/6

The missing power of saying “no”

Today’s parenting often swings between overindulgence and guilt-driven decisions. Saying “no” feels harsh, but always saying “yes” creates children who expect life to adjust for them.


Limits help children learn patience, delay gratification, and understand the value of effort. They don’t just hear “no,” they learn how to accept it—a crucial life skill that leads to emotional maturity and stability.

5/6

Emotional cushioning at the cost of emotional growth

In a world that’s hyper-aware of mental health, there’s sometimes an overcorrection—shielding children from any emotional discomfort.
Disappointment, sadness, even mild anxiety—these are treated like threats rather than parts of growing up.


Dr Amen explains that when children are not allowed to sit with difficult emotions, they may never learn to regulate them. They grow up believing that discomfort means something is wrong, instead of understanding that it’s simply part of being human.

6/6

Replacing life lessons with perfection pressure

Many children today are quietly struggling under the weight of expectations—to perform, succeed, and impress. At the same time, life lessons about responsibility, contribution, and failure are often softened or skipped.


Doing chores, taking ownership, learning from mistakes—these aren’t punishments; they’re foundational exercises for the brain and heart. Dr. Amen often reminds families that self-worth isn’t built through praise alone—it’s built through purpose and effort.


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Copyright © May 27, 2026, 10.26PM IST Bennett, Coleman & Co. Ltd. All rights reserved. For reprint rights: Times Syndication Service