Lost and found

Each year it gets lost in India, causing much hullabaloo till it’s located

It had gone and got itself lost again. Or not lost, but maybe just misplaced. This happens year after year, so it shouldn’t come as a surprise, but it does. 

There’s much confabulation and conjecture in mainstream and social media as to what the dickens could possibly have happened to the darn thing. Where could it have gone? 

It couldn’t be easy, getting itself lost or misplaced, the way it keeps doing. It’s not something small that could go and fall into some nook or cranny, under the sofa cushions in the sitting room. Or behind the fridge in the kitchen. Or lurking inside the potted plants in the balcony. 

It’s supposed to be pretty sizeable. Though how sizeable or unsizeable it is on any given occasion is a matter for great and lengthy disputation among the many experts whose job it is to know everything there is to know about the problematic thing in question. 

And the number of experts seems to be growing with each passing year. It’s a noteworthy growth industry, of specialised experts in this particular area of expertise, and contributes significantly to the much-needed generation of employment in the country.

The proliferation of experts is aided by the very essence of what it means to be an expert, in any field, in that no two or more experts can hold the same view or agree with one another, because if they did, instead of two, or more, experts you’d only need the one expert, who’d presumably be selected by the drawing of lots or some similar process founded on random chance, and the other, or others, would be pink-slipped, leading to a marked spike in the unemployment rate. 

This perpetually errant subject of overwrought discourse and debate is vital to the nation’s finances, by creating a superabundance of experts, and providing other economic stimuli.  

So, it’s a good thing that after all the many alarms and excursions it regularly causes, it always manages to find itself and turn up, as it has done this time around, sooner or later. 

Or, to put it more aptly, monsooner or later.