Gone to pot: The latest addition to your loo has you sitting on the lakh of luxury 😜

It was a half-page, full-colour ad in a national daily. The product it was promoting came with a hefty price tag, being the latest thing in status symbols. So what was it? A top-of-the-line smart phone with a matching gold-plated selfie stick? A diamond-encrusted Swiss chronometer which simultaneously told you the time in five different countries? A limited edition cricket bat autographed by Virat Kohli?

It was none of the above. It was a W/C, or what in popular parlance is known as a potty. And it was being offered at a price comparable to a top-of-the-line smart phone.

That much for a potty? You’d have to be a little potty in the head to go for a deal like that.

But not a few people are doing precisely that. Because this is a state-of-art, hi-tech, fully automated potty.

It comes with a hand-held remote control which allows you to make the potty lid go up and down on its own. Then you remote control the temperature of the seat so that it’s comfortable to sit on, not too hot or too cold.

When you’ve finished you use the remote to direct temperature-adjusted jets of water at the relevant portion of your anatomy with all the military precision of a surgical strike into enemy territory. And when you’re done and stand up, it flushes by itself.

Even as the sarkar, as part of its Swachh Bharat drive, tries to potty train the nation by providing a toilet in every village household, at the other end of the socio-economic spectrum the humble potty is being turned into a luxurious fashion accessory.

Forget conspicuous consumption. The new trend could be conspicuous evacuation, with the potty no longer hidden away in a smelly corner but given pride of place in the living room for guests to ‘Ooh!’ and ‘Ah’ over in envy.

And you will know why it’s called sitting on the throne, because you’ll feel as rich as a king when you do it.

On the other hand, a sceptic taking a pot shot at the whole business might say that W/C stands not for Water Closet but for What Crap.